Avoiding Anger and Blame

• Never bite the hand that is negotiating with you. Be appreciative that they are talking settlement with you.
• Blaming is biting, and so is showing anger.
• Both anger and blaming are counterproductive, and neither can ever get us what we want.
• You cannot be guilty of blaming if you never mention things that have already happened.
• Blaming your spouse will make him/her angry and angry people do not compromise.
• Never show your anger. It accomplishes nothing.
• Anger never sells anyone on anything.
• Angry people do not settle, they fight.
• Angry people make bad decisions.
• You cannot lessen your spouse’s anger until you can control your own.
• Your anger is your spouse’s best weapon.
• Never, ever get hooked by your spouse’s anger. Ignore it, and carry-on in a normal and pleasant tone of voice.
• Reason has little power against anger.
• Showing anger closes our spouse’s ears and prevents us from making our point.
• Anger distorts our perception, twists our thinking, and impairs our ability to solve problems.
• Showing anger gives our partners continued justification to see themselves as the victim.